Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a short-term (eight to 20 sessions) couples therapy. It is grounded in research while focusing on negative communication patterns and love as an attachment bond.
Attachment theory provides the emotionally-focused therapist with a “road map” to the drama of distress, emotions, and needs between partners. Couples undergoing EFT successfully move from distress to recovery. This recovery is quite stable and lasting, with little evidence of relapse back into distress.
EFT provides a language for healthy dependency between partners and looks at key moves and moments that define an adult love relationship. The primary goal of the model is to expand and re-organize the emotional responses of the couple. New sequences of bonding interactions occur and replace old, negative patterns. These new, positive cycles then become self-reinforcing and create permanent change. The relationship becomes a haven and a healing environment for both partners. The process reduces couples’ conflict while creating a more secure emotional bond. Couples learn to express deep, underlying emotions from a place of vulnerability and ask for their needs to be met. Partners begin to view undesirable behaviors (i.e., shutting down or angry escalations) as “protests of disconnection.” Couples learn to be emotionally available, empathetic and engaged with each other, strengthening the attachment bond and safe haven between them.
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